I feel kinda like shit...

I just wanted to write cause I need to get some things off my chest...

I just had an msn fight with a friend of mine about another friend of mine when really it wasnt my place to get involved. I feel really terrible for restirring up the whole situation and I dont know what to do to fix it. I am a little mad at the person who I had the fight with, just because of how they are handling the situation... but all in all I just hate fighting and when I tried to apologise I was just ignored... I just feel sick and wanna cry.

I hate upsetting people and I hate when my friends dont get along... I just want everyone to be happy all of the time... I cant handle it when theres shit going on :( especially when I cant do anything about it...

Anyway, this posting isnt really helping me to feel any better... so I hope the person who is mad at me can get over it soon and all this shit can blow over... cause in my opinion everything has been taken completely out of hand...

I think it sucks and im really over it... Its upsetting EVERYONE and its so not worth it.... BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

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A little story about the game of poker...

This story has a few holes in it... because it happened on Friday night and it is now Sunday night... But I wanted to write about it anyway :)

Friday night I was playing poker at the Sands Tavern... I sat down at my table and waited for the game to start... just before the dealing of the first hand began I said in my head 'what a great start to the night if I were dealt pocket aces'. The dealer deals out the first card... and then around comes the second card... I look down at them... and I kid you not... they were pocket aces!! I had to look at them a few times to make totally sure... but no mistaking it.. I'd called pocket aces. Anyway, being the first hand of the night... I didnt want to start off a bad note by raising before the flop... so I just called the minimum bet... Much to my discust a straight draw came out on the table... everyone checked until old mate to the right of me... he decided to go ALL IN!! All in on the first hand of the night... I thought about it for along time... if he was chasing I still had top pair and all that but there were too many other things that could have caught me out... so reluctantly I folded... But I did show my fold because I still couldnt believe what I had and the rest of the table was in awe with me.

So then... second hand of the night... I looked down at pocket jacks!! Can you believe that... two massive pockets one after the other... this time I decide to play a little bit harder considering what just happened... so I raised the bet I think to $100 - the blinds were $25 and $50... I had a few callers and the flop came out all small cards... So really I still had top pair... everyone checked... on the turn came a 7... here is where I should mention that there was also a 7 in the flop... So at this stage I had two top pairs... I think someone bet and I called or maybe I bet and they called... and on the river... there came a jack... this little beauty gave me top fullhouse... so I bet I think fairly largely... but the other guy who was willing to play me decided to reraise my large bet and go all in... I couldnt throw this hand away so I called him... the poor bugger had a fullhouse with sevens over jacks... but lucky ole me had him beat with my jack over seven fullhouse.... so that was a nice little pot to win!!

Third hand of the night... POCKET 10's... at this stage I am begining to think... what the hell is going on... this is insane (and mind you after my win with the second set of pockets the rest of the table was getting a bit 'holy moley' as well) anyway so this time I called bets all the way to the river cause there was all small cards on the board... turns out the guy I was betting against had pocket A's... how insane is that... so he beat me... but again everyone was spun out about me getting pockets and seeing A's twice in three hands...

The next few hands I had good cards.... but not pockets and didnt really win much of a pot... I dont really remember much of the other hands I won but I can tell you that in the rest of that night I also saw pocket 7's, pocket Q's AND pocket K's!!! It was just one hell of a trippy night... I ended up coming 14th... which wasn't too bad considering I was making some pretty silly calls in a few hands and I probably assed my way to 14th... but hey... 14th is better then not 14th :P unless it's 13th - 1st... :D

Oh and just to finish off the story... I backed up the next night (Saturday) to play again at the Sands and again I came 14th :) Though the cards weren't as amazing and pretty as the night before :)

The moral of the story is... I am still yet to win a tournament :( and I REALLLLLY would love to :D hehehe I've come second twice now (HOLY SHITE THERES A MASSIVE SPIDER COMING TOWARD MY ROOM :'( :\ HELP) and I have come third and made a few final tables and a few top 16's... but just no first.. not yet!!

I hate spiders :S

A flower for you my friend...

To Kelly and Mat...

Thank you for being my friend :) and thank you Kels for always managing to make me smile when I need it the most :) I really appreciate it!!

Heath might be my best friend :P... but you guys are real and true friends :) *high five* hehe

*MMMMMWWWAAAAAHHHH*

Tuesday = Positive Day

It is very hard to have a positive day when you are doing something which in my humble opinion is one of the most difficult and frustrating tasks in the world... enrolling for uni!!

Websites are down, passwords don't work, phone call after phone call leads to email after email just simply trying to get INTO to website... then when your in... finally, you have to run around for hours and hours finding out the information on the courses you should enroll in and when they are avaliable and how that will clash or not clash with other courses you have choosen to enroll in... then what if you need to apply for academic credit... well if you don't, thats great :D good on you... but if you do... well it's more phone calls, more emails and more running around!! But if you keep taking deep breaths and force a smile on your face then you can have a positive old day... especially if you keep reminding yourself... today is tuesday - Tuesday = Positive Day!

Anyway, so I started this all at around 8am this morning and it is now nearly 2:30pm... I have a list of classes that I am enrolled in... Only I dont have the SPECIFIC times of when I am supposed to go to uni and participate in these classes... but maybe I am just being fussy!?! Also, I havent been able to actually even ASK about wether or not I should bother with academic credit because I have to wait for more emails with information that I need... But the main thing is that I am in the system... I am on my way and I am ready for the next few little challanges!!! *Inhale a deep breath in..... hold it..... and breath out*

Im ready for you QUT... BRING IT ONNNNNNNNN

Challanges for 2007

My good 'ole pal Kelly has issued me with a challange to come up with a list of atleast 10 things I want to achieve in 2007... Which is all good and well... The only thing is, now that I have done it, she is going to hold me to it :S I have published the list on her site so she has constant regular access to it... Was that a good idea? hehe we will soon see!!

So here is my list... which I have just added to and Im sure will find more things to add to before the end of the year!! I can do it :D

My List...
1- Learn photoshop
1a- Name and organise all photos on my pc
1b- Take more photos for flickr
2- Participate in atleast ONE fun run in 2007
3- Get a pap smear :(
4- Study hard at uni to get atleast 6's and 7's to get into Pharmacy
5- Endevour to do something physical atleast ONCE each day
6- Improve my relationship with my Dad and his wife
7- Get involved in social uni events
8- Have another mole scan/skin cancer check
9- Wear my scar out without fear
10- Join a team sport (preferably netball)
11- Look into courses for training to become a casino dealer
12- Keep my bedroom tidy and learn to pick up after myself ESPECIALLY MY CLOTHES!!

QUT here I come

Well... I applied for uni, in Brisbane, for 2007 via QTAC about 4 months ago... My plan is to do B. Applied Science for one year and then apply for B. Pharmacy. To get into B. Pharmacy I need to get a kick arse GPA (grade point average) which means I need to do REALLY REALLY well this year... It's going to be really really hard but its something that I have to try... For once in my life I know where I should be, I feel like there is a job that I was made for... Only its not an easy one to get!!

My dilema at the moment is that when I made the decision to move back to Brisbane and study I didn't really have much of a life up here or very much to leave behind... Besides my job which I absolutly love to death. But NOW... now I have so many awesome friends and a nice little social life and Im really settled in... I love the coast and I love my friends and I love my job... Ive haven't really felt like I REALLY fit in for a long time... but here I do!!

But it is the only choice I have if I really honestly want to give pharmacy a fair go... I have to be in Brisbane to maximise my chances of getting in... And there is also the small fact of my whole family and three of my good friends (one of whom is about to make me an aunty) are all in Brisbane... So it's not like I don't wanna go back... but I am totally torn... Im really really gonna miss the coast and everyone up here... I have a few big decisions to make about my employment status and how often Im going to make trips up the coast to catch up with all my buddies... Thankfully a few of them are online so atleast I can still keep in constant contact!!

It will be nice to be back closer to my parents and my girls... but I will from now on be calling the coast home... and I will defiantly be back... :D THE SUNSHINE COAST HAS NOT SEEN THE LAST OF PAMBALAM!!!

hehehehe *MWAH* Love yas :D xoxooxx

When you think you've got it in the bag...

Last night I played some poker with the APL at the Maroochy RSL Club. I have played a few games in the last few weeks and have been consistently poor... Last night I feel pretty crappy... nice and tired and kinda ugly 'cause Kella made me not wear makeup (we were sposed to not wear makeup TOGETHER, but she never showed... but she had a decent excuse :P). Anyway, so I sat at my table and stared down at my chips... Everyone else at my table chipped up - the APL have this $5 spend promotion where if you spend $5 in the venue before the start of the game you get chipped up with a bonus $500 chip - I didn't because I was getting sick of spending $5 and loosing it all before the break (after 3 set of blinds there is a 20min break and it is my goal to ATLEAST make it past the break). We flipped for dealer and the dealer was the first person to my left... which is almost as good as me being dealer myself... I always feel a bit more confident if I have a chance to fold before I spend money :D AND boy did I have a chance to fold... The cards I was looking down at each hand were horrible, 5 2 offsuit, 6 8 offsuit etc etc... So I was folding until I was big blind... I don't remember what I had but I think it was FINALLY a picture card, and I won the pot!! It went up a little from there, a few hands after my big blind I hit a Q J offsuit... I didn’t really know anyone at the table so I didn’t feel bad and did a preflop raise to $300... I had a few quick callers (this made me a little wary), the flop came down 7 6 J - giving me top pair, so again I bet hard another $300... I had one caller and then another guy came over the top and raised to $500, I called and so did Carly (the other player) the turn brought nothing, I still had top pair so I bet another $500... Carly thought about it... wanted to fold but ended up calling... and so did the other guy... Again nothing on the river so I bet again... they both called. We flipped our cards and much to our surprise Carly and I both had Q J... and she nearly folded it!! The other guy had absolutely nothing so he was out of it and Carly and I split the pot. After this I folded a lot :P Then it was break time... At the break I was sitting $1700 which is pretty good considering I didn’t chip up at the start!

Coming back after the break I won a chip race (this is where they get rid of the smaller chips which are no longer needed, they count up how many are out on the table and switch that amount for the same amount of larger chips... then they high card around the table to see who gets the chips - it was me :D). Anyway... the next hand I played was 69 suited. I wasn’t a blind and I probably SHOULDNT have played it... but I did... and not only that I preflop raised $1000 with it!! I had 2 callers!! I was panicking. The flop hit 5 3 4... I felt like chasing but I think I just checked. Everyone checked... then an A hit on the turn... The other guy bet into the A and someone else folded... Why I called I do not know... but I did... and I was all in, so we flipped over our cards. I was a bit hesitant to show what I was playing with... The other guy flopped over the A and I thought for sure he had taken it out. I was getting ready to get up and leave the table thinking nothing could save me... Then the dealer flips over a 2 on the river... I still didn’t see and was still getting up when people started yelling out 'SHES GOT A STRAIGHT, SHE WINS WITH A STRAIGHT'! Took me ages to even see it hahahaha but I took out the pot and it was a MONSTER!!

The next hand I played would be the end of me. I was big blind... So as per usual I did not look at my cards... My minimum bet was already out there so there wasn’t really any point looking at my cards. So I sat there everyone called so I checked. The flop comes down in smallish cards but all diamonds. I check cause I still haven’t looked... Old mate to my left (who was a newbie) decides to bet, I’m not sure how much but another guy called him... then it was time for me to look... I looked down at J J (pocket jacks, one of which was a diamond). So I decide to chase :D and I call. The turn card is not a diamond but it is a 9... which puts two 9's on the board... this I failed to notice. Old mate bets again, the other guy calls and I chase again... The river card couldn’t have been worse... A of diamonds... giving me a fantastic chance of having the highest flush with my J diamonds... I go all in with $2900 , Old mate calls VERY quickly and the other guy also calls... Old mate didn’t have quite enough so there was a $200 side pot... The other guy turns over his 7 of diamonds... So I apologise as I turn over my J diamonds... then old mate flips over his A 9... He'd rivered the full house... I couldn’t believe it... I thought Id taken it out for sure... I won the $200 but I was small blind anyway so I lost that in the next hand.

When I got out I was still dumb founded. Good on the guy with the full house though... I don’t get mad when I loose to a better hand so after id realised what happened I went back and congratulated him :) I think that id I had of seen the possibility of a full house on the table I probably would have just checked after the rivier card instead of going all in… But I say that now… It would be pretty hard to check the highest flush and old mate probably would have bet with his full house and it would have been EXTREMELY hard to fold my hand… But he was new so chances are he did’t/doesn’t know how to bluff yet… but still maybe things could have turned out differently BUT… I made it past the break for the first time this season so that is whats important!!

Turns out he was on the final table... I don’t know if he won because I left early... But way to go the new guy!!! Normally I don’t like new players… but he was alright :)

What Lolly are You??

I was just having a conversation with a friend of mine, Kelly... I say to her 'I feel like a lolly' and much to my surprise she replies 'And what does a lolly feel like?' - this was an msn conversation so my imagination immediatly puts her in an office with fancy glasses asking me, who is laying on a leather couch, this question in a calm and inviting voice. Anyway, so I answer her 'squishy' and as I expect she turns around and says... 'not always, depends on what lolly, what if you were a hard boiled lolly?, then you would be tough and sweet' and I say 'Thats true, but I am a jube or an aniseed lolly' (with reference to the being sweet all the time... which is very hard to do.. I thought least this way I could be a lolly... but I don't have to be sweet) to which Kella replies 'aniseed? omg, I think you'd be better then that'. Which is the whole point to this blog... What a lovely... but strange compliment :D There was more to the coversation but that was my point.. and ANYWAY the question I pose to you now is...

WHAT LOLLY ARE YOU... AND WHY???

Kelly - Chicko Baby (everyone loves em, sweet, cute and tasty)
Pamabalam - Milk Bottle (everyone loves em, can be hard on the outside and squishy in the middle, look plain but go off with a bang)

hehe

Welcome to the world of ME!

Hi there and thanks for visiting 'My First Blog'! I never normally have the motivation to do these sorts of things... But I have a friend who is a blog-a-holic and I think I've been struck with blogfever!! Symptoms and tell tale signs include, pointless ramblings about my life that most people probably don't care about and endless hours spent infront of the computer typing pointless ramblings about my life that most people probably don't care about!! :D

For this first blog I guess I should just give you a little run down on me...

1- My name is Pam, Pammy, Pambalam, Pamela or lilyprune (if im hiding my identity :P) and im 22 years old (nearly 23)
2- My hobbies include - Playing and loosing Texas Holdem' Poker in the Australian Poker League (which I am sure you will hear more about in later editions), taking photos and publishing them on flickr, shopping, talking :D and listening to music
3- My fave bands are - Sevendust, Nickelback, Breaking Benjamin, Shinedown, Silverchair, Snow Patrol, Wolfmother, Three Doors Down just to name a very slight few
4- My goal in life is to become a Pharmacist
5- I am in love with Jonathon Thurston and the game of Rugby League
6- Annnnd... I think... I am addicted to blogging

I think that will do you for now... If your still reading at this point, THANKYOU :D I really do appreciate it!!

Take care and keep your eyes peeled for many more blogs on the adventures and misadventures of ME w00 :D

xoxoxo